NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OK OK OK OK.

So the one person outside of my family within my agegroup that I trust the most has written a blog about her lack of transperancy. Yvette told me this already but I did not know the lack of transperancy was mostly in reference to NEGATIVE THOUGHTS. Maaaaaaaaaaaaaan idk what to say right now. This is my best friend (i think lol) and I've learned the one thing that brings me closest to hate is one of her qualities... Im conflicted... I need to call ppl. IDK what it is but there's something abt aperson smiling in your face when they have a non smiley face thought that IRKs me and strikes me as innately... im talking about my friend... this is not easy to write... almost evil. I cannot trust many ppl with anything I say because I don't know who's smiling at me while despising me at the same time... I'm rlly hurt.Africans always get on this bullshit. Especially girls. I should have seen this. OOOOORRRR maybe I saw this at one point and that fed in to my despise... no no no I wouldn't have ever liked her had i felt that way. I'm loosing it off one person. WTF. That being said, I'll continue to tell her stuff but i'll leave room for dissappointment... yoooooooo. I wasn't supposed to read that. Now wtf am I supposed to do? I hate that man I FUCKING hate that. yo. I'm fuming my ass off. WHO am I going to meet in this world that is like me? I possibly have twice as many faults as the people I see bad qualities in but the good qualities I possess seem so rare. YO. I thought i had one. OK OK.. calling Marcus to find out if he does this hold on.......................................................................................................................................................YES YES YES YES!!!!!! I LOVE U YO... PINK FUBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!!

This is why I liked this guy from the effin second day of high school no homo. Transparency. So I think I found the quality I like most in people. Some say giving, others loving, some intellect, another may say loyalty. NO; Transparency.

OK so with all the crappiness Im feeling I learned something abt me. Yvette we shall speak more on FB. Can you be like be "taught" transparency?

This shit is not Okie Dokie. Okie Dokie?



EDIT: so like I'm talking to Fubar and I'm trying to convince myself she's not a bad person... He's not helping. We're more like confirming my fears than washing them away.... ?????????? He just told me she sometimes acts nice to people she doesn't like. Tear.

I asked him how about miles holding back? "Proooooobablllyyy worse than Yvette" yo. what is happening to my life rite now.

so I asked "why do they do it?" "They don't want to hurt people's feelings."

So I tell him how I interpret this. Because this is so long it is not verbatim. "So they're scared to hurt people's feelings. As stated in Yvette's blog there's some religious backing to hers. How can you say that you want to be nice by not hurting people's feelings but you act falsely towards them? OK Marcus has confirmed only Yvette does this not Miles. If Miles doesn't like you he wont talk to you. Mah Nigga. Ej has also been semi confirmed (oxymoron). Y my Pappi.

Ok Ephesians is a temporary excuse until she finds something better... I'm sad mad something... The world can Lick my Scrotum.

Okie Dokie? Okie Dokie.